Saturday, May 19, 2007

If...

If... At the moment with nothing better to do, a lot of questions popping into my mind especially the If... questions. One of the greatest If... questions I've never had any answer to would be "If i were to die tomorrow..." I do wonder what are the actions i would take having such knowledge and the implications it has. Therefore, I've just checked out my own personal death clock. Wanna know when i'm gonna pass on? Just click on the link. For those who prefer not to know or don't really bother, it's ok, maybe ignorance is bliss sometimes.

Back to my own rhetorical question. If I were to die tomorrow, what would i do? I guess if that was really the case, there is nothing much that i can do. This ain't a pessimistic view of my life. Rather, i think that since death is inevitable, y create a hoo ha over it? It's not like by doing something useful it'll make it a more meaningful death. Some people would say they'd take that chance to say how much they love their loved ones and show their affection in the limited time. Some people would get so scared and be at loss of what they would want to do. Some people will have regrets and try to repent for the sins they have committed throughout their life while some evil ones will definitely let the long suppressed darkness within them take control over and create chaos knowing well that this is their last chance to let loose their evil within on Earth. Me? Just gonna be another day. Shouldn't I at least try to tell my parents I love em considering the fact they have loved me for so long? Well i think i'd not do that. I'd rather let em think it is just another routine day then have them worry bout my change in behaviour. Had i not been capable of showing my parents my love for em in this 20 years of my existence i guess trying to show it to em in just one day is not doing my parents justice. For o the scarifices they've done for me, only three words of "I love you" or treating em to a posh restaurant for dat one day will never be enough to express my gratitude for em. What bout doing sth which i regret not doing? Well possible but highly unlikely. In just one day, if such a miracle is to happen then that's really something. Wait - i can be a suicidal maniac going around on a killing spree. Nar- I ain't dat crazy. For me, it'd be over d next day, for d victims and their families, their lives are ruined - a fate worse than death. Wat's d point of getting innocents killed? Anyway i believe in Karma - what goes around comes around ( Not Justin Kayutasik's song). Well first If... question related to death answered.

Second question "If I were to die tommorow, would anyone miss me?" Obviously i have no answer to this question as it is for those who know me to decide. For one, my family members will miss me and be grief stricken but eventually they'd move on i'm sure. What bout my friends? This i really ain't sure. To em, was i ever a close friend? Could they indulge their secrets to me? Could i be trusted? Then again i might not have made any impact on their lives at o. It'll appear as just another shock to em but when d day goes by, they'd move on n forget bout a person who's called Nick.

In d end, I'll never know bout o these till d day i meet My Creator. If u're reading this blog, would it make any difference to ya if i die? :)

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