Thursday, October 11, 2007

Blast off!!!

Malaysia's Rocket a.k.a the rocket the Russians built and piloting with a Malaysian on board, being transferred to launch site.

3! 2! 1! Jerk Off!!!... Opps... I meant blast off!!!

9th October 2007 - Malaysian has once again proven that Malaysia Boleh ( 2 b read in a sarcastic tone). The astronaut (or cosmonaut as he was trained in Russia or even Angkasawan if d Malaysian Government decides to label that as Malaysia's trademark for their astronuts) Dr Sheikh Muszaphar Shukor (Dr. SMS catchy name eh??? ), is the first Malaysian in space !! Yippee. According to him, he'd try to fast if possible though the Perak Ufti did say he need not stick to it. What's more, the Malaysian Government has even released a handbook on performing Islamic prayers in space -a 12-page booklet titled "Muslim Obligations in the International Space Station." Yupe... Malaysia Boleh...Heck... I bet that when space exploration becomes common, this guidebook will be the best seller in Muslim countries.

The Malaysian space programme is part of the deal which comes along with the purchase of Sukhoi Fighters from Russia. A mere $1billion is all that is needed to send a Malaysian into space according to the Gov so y not seize this opportunity huh? So began the search for the suitable candidates years ago and finally it came down to the final two -
Dr Sheikh Muszaphar Shukor and Faiz Khaleed ( a dentist - maybe he can study how cavity affect teeth in space :p ). Now, NASA has claimed that Dr. SMS is just a flight passenger to the space station and this has caused a furore among the politicians in M'sia. Come on - he'd be conducting who-knows-what experiments in space ok??? If he is just a mere passenger then this would also mean the Sukhoi jet fighters would include pilots from Russia with Malaysian pilots as passengers only...

Lets speculate what Dr. SMS might do at the space station:

Dr SMS: WOOHOO!!! I'm the first to celebrate Hari Raya in space !!! Wonder if my curry rendang taste better here :P *slurp*

Other astronauts: *shakes their head and takes out their equipment from their backpacks to start conducting experiments*

Dr. SMS: Hey guys, y are u o so serious? Try some of the chicken curry i brought with me. It's truly Malaysian... No??? What bout the beef rendang? Sure you don't want it? The pork satay taste gr8 2. opps...

Other astronauts: *decides to have a taste of Malaysian food from their comrade NOT PASSENGER MIND YOU.*

Dr. SMS: The food from Malaysia is gr8 right? Wait till u try the Malaysian women... Ngehehe... What bout teh tarik to wash down o d food? Aww... Dun be shy... Lemme show you how WE TARIK it...

B4 they can stop him, starts to tarik d teh.
Scientific fact: For the tea to be "pulled" there is a need for gravity. In space, there is NO GRAVITY and the force will cause the liquid to be dispersed all around the place.

Other astronauts: NO!!!!!!... ARGH!!! It's hot !!! Get it off my face!!! I can't SEE!!! T.T !@#@$#%$#^^%&%^#$%$%#

After all that,the results of scientific experiments that was revealed:
Experiment 1: Effects of micro-gravity on protein crystallisation
Results: The curry chicken and beef rendang taste like solid rocks. I think the protein in em must have crystallized. I prefer having em at home :(

Experiment 2: Effects of micro-gravity on cell development:
Results: Seems like micro gravity does accelerate the growth of cells... I've developed a beer tummy up here :( Even my waist has increased by 5 inches :'( Then again, it might be caused by the curry chicken and beef rendang.

Oh well, that's all folks. No more crazy pondering from me. Blasting off!!!

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